hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
We played shuffleboard at the bar last night...another sign we are getting tooooo old.
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
Just say you're the husband at the front desk to get in. She's in room 15 at the ER.
what? who is this?
the last call horn was blaring when I tried peeling you off the bathroom floor than you uttered "Ill take the toothless one.'
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
They didn't have a "sorry I was late for your birthday party because I was getting arrested" card.
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
A gay guy went down on me in the club bathroom and then fixed my makeup for me
its gonna be a great night
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
Randomize
