What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
in hindsight, drinking 2 bottles of wine probably wasnt going to put me in an optimal position for a job interview
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
Either I'm a lot drunker than I thought, or he has three dicks....
I think I'm gonna have to go with the first one...
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
I keep telling girls I work at the carnival and then guessing their weights. I'm pretty sure I'm about to get kicked out.
I'm convinced my penis is the only thing holding this relationship together.
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
I just ordered $70 worth of pizza and I'm not even ashamed. Happy Valentine's Day to me.
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
I asked him to help me break in the space ship aka my bed.
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
So, just how hungover are you?
Not at all, surprisingly.
That has to be your X-Men power.
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
Randomize
