ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
Just when you think you're never going to have sex again, BOOM you're naked in bed with a guatemalan
i dont care if it was her birthday. if she leaves me with a half rack of budweiser and her boyfriend obviously shits gonna go down.
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
It's a gateway drink.... Starts with wine... Then I wake up in my car with mascara on my arms covered in french fries...
How bad is it that I'm banned from all of your family functions due to sleeping w/ both your brother and sister and they both hate me for pursing a relationship with either of them.
You came over, called every girl Comrade Heather, and then declared that you were an Eagle, and we were your young.
So all in all, a good night.
I mean there are things broken right and left, I woke up surrounded by dog statues, and we had a vodka bubble bath.
At least I had a $10 coupon for Plan B today. Smart shopping for bad decisions
Dude so last night I was eating out my gf and her kitten climbed onto my back and fell asleep. AND SHE DIDN'T NOTICE FOR LIKE 10 MINUTES
My v day was great. There's a cum stain in the shape of a handprint on my sheets
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
You peed in the sink and kept shouting "I'm the black swan! Ca-caw!"
Randomize
