Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
First order of business is dropping my 9 am gym class. I'm sweating pure vodka.
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
I will always remember today as the day I narrowly escaped having to touch a tiny penis
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
The bottle of Wild Turkey is empty and there is a pile of wet cement in the garage. What happened?
I wish the guy I was sleeping with wasn't on house arrest.
Hey! I need booze. And penises. And a lot of mistakes that I will regret in the morning.
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
I swear I was in Legend of Zelda Twilight Princess and American Ninja Warrior at the same time. I'm never getting high while rock climbing again.
Hey now one little girl thought it was cool I was covered in blood. Apparently according to her Mom she wants to be a surgeon when she grows up
we've never stayed at a party for more than an hour. we always end up at a pizzaria. by ourselves. with no friends.
what else are best friends for?
After this weekend, all I can think about is bald eagles flying in front of fireworks and giving birth to fucking uncle sam. Also, beer.
Randomize
