It's like God shit irony all over that family
yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
dude you need a shock collar for some of the things you say when you're drunk.
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
We've given up. My vagina is tired of constant lonely nights and disappointments. This is our retirement.
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
I went to the bar without a bra on pretty sure you can go to Taco Bell drive thru with no pants
my ass is still wet. this is highly unpleasant. give me 5 to get changed and I'm all yours. or you can yell things to me while I shower and burn clothes
I just got the most majestic image of a potato sack full of dildos getting whipped at your head in slow motion.
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
I know where his drugs are but not my pants
just because he was passed out beside the toilet, didn't give you tge right to pee on him
my aim is off when im drunk
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
Randomize
