Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
You never realize how many sex toys you have until you have to strategically hide them while moving out of your dorm.
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
I blacked out the second time 3am rolled around. My brain was taking a beating trying to do that math.
I AM OVERLY HIGH AND OVERLY AWARE OF MY TONGUE IN MY MOUTH
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
New low reached: a cockroach has actually drowned itself in our dirty dishes. We are heathens. Cleaning dance party tonight. No excuses.
I'm also sorry that I ate your chicken sandwich while you were throwing up....
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
Everything isn’t always sunshine & rainbows. Sometimes there’s tequila.
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
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