you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
Just pulled my keys, cell-phone and a pack of cigarettes out from between my cleavage. This one guy's face was priceless.
My family is watching Intervention and taking notes. I need to leave NOW!
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
We lost track of him for only 10 min and he gets kicked out for sneaking into the kitchen and trying to operate the deep fryer.
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
How did the date go? No fake eyeballs this time?
Buying drug test kits off amazon. And qualifying for amazonSmile donation to a kids hospital feels wrong and funny at the same time xD
Randomize
