Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
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Due to certain anatomical proportions it was less like fucking and more like childbirth.
He always takes me to get taco bell after we hook up in his car. It's sort of become a booty call tradition.
He let him chew on his fu man chew. The man has the patience of a saint
Also, I'm sat on the floor drinking cava because life is just not working for me tonight.
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
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I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
Took an adderall for the first time in a few weeks. Spent 45 minutes peeling an orange TO PERFECTION.
Also, we can't be seen together looking suspicious or sexually satisfied
I love you.
Bad choice
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