Dude I just witnessed a midget touching himself and singing the chorus to somebodys watching me by michael jackson... it kinda turned me on
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
Handle of 100 proof captain dressed like a pilgrim here we go
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
Chances are I'll be there for your wedding. Camelbaks filled with jack and coke are appropriate attire, right?
Found our threesome girl. She says I'm pretty. She doesn't know I'm pregnant. Yet. Think we can pull it off?
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
I give you full permission to fuck a rando on my air mattress.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Admittedly shitfaced... I have two questions. 1)why is the fan in my bathroom on? (Sub-text: is there a ghost?). 2) is your underwear really argyle?
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
We drove through Taco-Bell on our way to the ER
well apparently i sat in the bathroom staring in the toliet at my vomit. it was blue. how was your night?
He let me share his family pack of hot pockets with him. Chivalry isn't dead after all.
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
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