she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
Turned in a paper today on drug abuse. Chose to write about percocet. Just realized I started 2 sentences with "This amazing drug"
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
i just opened the overnight bag i packed at 2am last night. Apparently all i thought id need was a handful of quarters, mascara and one sock
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
All I know is I had a penis in one hand a bottle of wine in the other
your dad made us margaritas and breakfast on the morning. I think it's safe to say he relives his glory days through us
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
I don't care how hot she is, her cat has pissed on me twice.
He should know he can't successfully wrestle in pudding fully clothed. Amateur.
And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
Dude, seriously, fucking stop introducing me as "Thomas, with the dick piercing." you are the worst wingman ever.
Why is there an inflatable flamingo in the backseat of my car?
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