For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
I can't go out tonight I need to save my money for important things.....like rogaine and ecstasy.
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
nothing like Chinese food and masturbating on a Saturday night
We're at that point in our relationship where sweatpants sex has become acceptable...
Wearing scrubs to buy plan b so I look like I have my life together.
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
You said you couldn't use your body anymore so you made me push the buttons on your phone while you made alien sound effects
The fact that the praying hands are in my top emojis defines how 2016 is going so far
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
I imagine you as a cat holding your burrito with two paws and cutely eating it
So my furniture is upside-down, two lamps are glued to the ceiling, and there is a kitten sleeping on Kyle's face. Please tell me what happened last night....
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