LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
Where are you? I hear fireworks and you've gone missing. I'm sure that is not coincidence.
im not sure what exactly happened but i may need help faking my own death
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm getting turned down for sex. Apparently my "sexual appetite" cannot be satiated even by a man who's such a deviant he went to prison for jerking off in his car.
My arrest report says I was found in midtown "performing lewd and lascivious acts on top of art meant for public display and enjoyment".
Sometimes I'm sad but then I realize that bagels.
So...guess who had sex tied to the ladder of a caboose under the stars in Joshua Tree? This bitch
He sat next to me, put his arm around me, yelled at his girlfriend that he was breaking up with her, and told me I'm his little pet for the night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
DUDE NEVER CALL THE COPS BACK
I’m gonna slowly take you in my mouth and push you deep into my throat so my lips are right up against your body and then I’m gonna fucking bite your shit off if one more of our friends shows me a snap you took while I was giving you head. Are we clear?
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
you were just in my dream and you looked at me and said "Christmas is cold." I think you're wasted even in my dreams.
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
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