Remember that one time i smeared period blood on your face?
I hate you
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
im so sorry the vomit froze your passenger door shut... you should have stopped.
Why can't I live in a world where my only 2 options are rum bikini hot tub party or masturbating?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
He'd rather cuddle with his shitty little miniature dog than the half naked girl in his bed. I've lost all hope for him and my vagina
He Dutch ovened me while I was hiding under the covers from his mom. Needless to say it did not end well.
I know you saw me get knocked out after I stepped on that rake why did you leave me there
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
My mom just told me I look like darth vader. how's your night?
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
I want you to remember that you started masturbating in front of a car full of people. That drunk.
I know you're here! I can hear your phoneeeee. Wake up and do illegal things with me.
I love millennial parents. One of the moms at the daycare center literally told me she and her husband named two of her kids after batman characters and one after game of thrones
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