i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
cum and cheesecake for breakfast...don't fucking tell me pride week isn't awesome
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
you kept thanking chef boyardee for having pull tab cans
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
You drank the pool water to get rid of your hiccups
Shame is for Republicans.
Randomize
