Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
What are these yellow papers in the kitchen?
These are the tickets we got last night.
Did i sign this one as Grizzly Bear?
Yes...yes you did.
HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
totally watching dr. phil and getting eaten out right now. be jealous.
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
they had to hand cuff you because you wouldn't stop trying to unzip the paramedic's pants...this is why i love you
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
i chased my gummy vitamins with cold bacon, never say I don't take care of myself
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
"We drove to the deserted part of the parking lot, and that's where we blew each other. It was so romantic."
That's good. So do you know why there is a giant pile of old tires in the laundry room and kitchen?
Well we knew you needed some tires, found someone on the way home who was giving them away and took them all. Has to be 4 in there you can use.
Howd last night go?
well he stumbled in my parents door drunk and then asked my mom if she was my grandma. Id say as far as first impressions go, he failed miserably
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