Pretty sure somebody just said 'I used to have a nipple'
that's awkward
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
When sleeping with someone new: should you hide the magnum condoms, or let him know what he has to live up to?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
I looked at you and you stared at me dead in the eyes then sprayed febreze at your crotch and winked.
Oh god. It's like a broken faucet. My guts sound like a bilge pump clogged with golf balls and cake frosting.
Rick two cubicles down puked and that triggered three others puking into their trash cans as well. The janitorial staff hates it when we go drinking on a work night.
I'm just gonna stay I'm bed where it is warm and cozy and nobody knows me as the girl that puked on a stripper
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's not even close to Halloween but there is a girl in a nurses outfit. Twerk or twat.
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
Hey sorry about last night. can I come pick up my tooth?
You walked up to a random girl on the street and asked her for a bite of her pizza...
I just woke up hand cuffed to the bar and shirtless, so yeah I think I need you to come get me.
If the multiverse is real, would you screw yourself? I'd screw myself.
Randomize