Apparently he's never heard a queef, he totally thought I farted and got freaked out.
i have accomplished my summer goal of being able to relate to every taylor swift song
never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
those are the first brownies ive had since i was 13 that didnt have weed in them.
My last google search last night was 'vodka swimming pool'.
Its like every time I go out with you, it always involves Serbian chicks and taco bell and you always manage to get both all over my bed.
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT
COME TO THE BLANKET FORT
There is no amount of alcohol that can make me forget I had a Jimmy Kimmel sex dream
When you mimic motorboating Jennifer Love Hewitt, is it really that hard to understand why no one thinks you're straight?
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
If you're not my stylist, having sex with me, or agreeing to have sex with me don't fucking touch my hair.
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
Randomize
