the new term for farting is butt boxing.
there was already a condom in her . . and it was bigger than me
Im shirtless eating a burrito. How urgent is this?
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
I wish I could be happy with a nice Christian girl, but no, I need a hot mess who starts bar fights
You were mean to me and you broke my heart and hurt my feelings. You dont get to talk to me about Peter Dinklage
And anyway at least being paid in opium makes a cool story
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
Nothing says "Jesus has forgiven your sins" like finding out you're not pregnant on Easter.
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
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