I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
I added "don't hook up with boys with girlfriends" to my new years resolution and realized how sad it was that it made me actually feel like a better person
Things are burning & the world smells of peanut butter. It's beautiful.
I will not remember tonight for the most part. This text will be evidence. You can and probably will use this against me.
Ive seen him cuddling a giant inflatable seahorse. Nothing could be creepier than that.
I mean like, my liver will beg my brain for mercy. Brainll be like I'm Greg Jennings. Liverll be like I'm Darren Sharper. Brainll be like hold my diiiiick.
Drunken snow shoveling. Visiting my family is starting to become a seriously risky venture.
You're a five foot adderall and caffeine fueled ball of sexual frustration and suppressed rage. It's only a matter of time before you snap. We're taking bets on when.
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
Why put me through the conflicting battle of being happy for your vagina but sad for my vagina for no reason ahole
Aaaaaaaand dick pic. God bless america, and god bless tinder.
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
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