She's JV to your varsity
Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
I have a client coming in and there's a note that says she wants her hair to like Elisabeth Hasselback's from the view
that's Oklahoma for you
we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
Should I tell her she gave me head in the kitchen while I was eating a cupcake or would that hurt her dignity too much?
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
I think the moment I knew you were going to black out was when I told you how many shots you had already and you were shocked and then poured another one
Holy sore nipples Batman
Surprise court date day!!! Wake the fuck up!
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
not ubering you a puppy
And why in he fuck did I get 'dick' in Romanian tattooed on my forearm
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
Randomize
