yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
This might sound awkward, but can I borrow a dildo for class?
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
They asked if I was about to puke and my response was to laugh and suddenly throw up. Continuing my asshole streak I kept laughing while still vomiting.
I only remembered where urgent care was because it's across the street from my favorite bar
He asked me where I wanted it. I told him in the condom. He stops mid thrust and says "you're no fun" and then blew. Chivalry is semi dead.
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
A 5 day bender that ended with refusing to pay my bar tab before I left the city. I offered to send them a selfie so they knew to never let me back in.
You left me a drunk voicemail of you describing your pizza to me at 2 AM
I just wrote my resume on the same park bench I got felt up at in freshman year of highschool... I've truly come full circle
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
You drunk? Cause I have a terrible idea...
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
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