Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
I just found a dead bug in my nose. if that's the worst thing up there im considdering myself lucky.
My cardio has turned into running out of the cold from bar to bar.
I couldn't remember if it was hamsters or Iraq that you hated. I'm so sorry.
I just peed on my pajamas. Its gonna be a long night. Don't forget the cookies.
she gave me a blowjob during our lunchbreak and expected me not to tell people
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
P.s. I wore your shirt today and it has your blood all over it, but I am at a funeral home and they are using embalming fluid to get your blood stains out right now.
My ex's psycho new girlfriend found my vibrator I forgot at his place. Apparently she didn't find it as funny as I did. 😂
Holy shit last night was like the irresponsible Olympics for me
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
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