She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
Sorry about the voicemail last night, people in hostel thought getting the clap from cheating on me wasn't enough and you hearing a 6 foot 5 Swedish dude bang the shit out of me was needed.
Other than a hickey from some random Canadian roller derby girl, I came out unscathed
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
only thing in my fruit bowl is 4 champagne corks and a jenga piece . Tuesday.
In other news, I apparently ate my retainers while rolling last night.
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
Btw I'm already known as the drunk roommate. Don't know if that's a success or a failure seeing as it hasn't even been a week since I've been here
Let us ponder on the good times. Ya know when the Jonas brothers were incapable of growing facial hair and I didn't fully understand what a dick looks like
I have an important idea to tell you when I'm sober about a cat scratching my nose once and what it taught me. DONT LET ME FORGET.
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
I use my feet as sexual weapons
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
Randomize
