Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
he accidentally used the toothbrush i use to induce my bulemia...i feel like this is something he shouldnt find out...
you lied. pity sex is amazing.
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet
He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
Things I had in my bed when I woke up: an avocado, a toilet brush, and a note that says thanks but no thanks with the number of taco bell on it. WHAT DID I DRINK?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
He just said Bill Nye is just a dude. If I ever considered sleeping with him, I never will now.
When you realized the door was unlocked, you did the mission impossible yheme song and snuck into the bathroom. And continued it while you peed.
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