The woman in front of me has a completely clear purse. I can see everything. It's ballsy because her vagisil is on display.
I don't know why girls would even talk to someone as drunk as I was.
once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
Guy Shares All The ‘New Discoveries’ He’s Made Since Moving In With His Girlfriend And It’s Hilariously Relatable
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
No one understands that once a girl pours a handle of smirnoff all over herself, clearly she is wasted
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
Tomorrow, if I don't look at least 5% better than I do on a regular day to day basis, I want you to hit me and tell me that no one will ever love me if I continue to look like I just rolled out of a cocaine induced hibernation. I'm asking you for tough love.
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
Guy Accidentally Starts A Group Chat With All The Girls He’s Talking To And Gets Absolutely Roasted
He kept humping my leg and whispering "dont worry, thats my phone not my penis"
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
AND WHAT FELONIES DID I MISS OUT ON WHILE SLUMBERING!?
I almost died in that meeting. Nearly dried up and blew away in the pure powder form of boredom
I know that feel bro
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!