Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
I just found that video of you jumping onto my exercise ball feet-first and face-planting into my shoe rack.
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
apparently my new 420 ritual is to look at the clock at 4:20 and realize i'm already too high
"You're the only girl I haven't made out with yet" = worst pick up line ever
Apparently my thong was thrown in the cornfield last night. No one will tell me why.
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
I told you naked hot tub wrestling would turn bad now one of us has a gash on the head and another a black eye
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
My younger brother asked me "to stop fucking his girlfriends older sisters"
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
Omg I just looked in my purse from last night.. 10 bags of gummy bears.
Randomize
