new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
you know you were refereeing rock paper scissors for who got to make out with your sister right?
I will return your cat, I saw a mouse in my apt last night and your door was unlocked, it seemed really practical
Telling me its the beginning of school is like telling me the crown royal fairy has come back from vacation.
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
just found a someones bra in what seems to be a mix of pickle juice and vodka in my fridge. Who was over here lately?
I guess I made wings because there's chicken everywhere. Even on the walls. 3 of them. It's like a chicken grave yard.
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
Don’t worry I was with my ex husband for 10 years and he could never remember the year I was born, when our dating anniversary was or what year I graduated high school. But I still know that mother fuckers SSN lol
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
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