So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
Apparently my gaydar only works on americans. Frenchie capris has two topless chicks in our kitchen making him breakfast.
Why is your name on a gluestick in a plastic baggy stuck to my door?
So it's always a good weekend when you don't get any sleep, try opening a bottle of wine on rocks, and end up needing a tetanus booster for our stupidity... Same thing next weekend?
as soon as I stop standing here with one leg up on my bathroom counter admiring my balls, I'm going to go tan. and then you may come over.
Every time I stand up, gravity punches me in the tits. This is horrible.
You were drunk it couldn't have been that bad
I've never been drunk enough to enjoy getting a blister on my dick.
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
Who are you, and why are you in my phone as Elf on the Shelf
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
He kept spinning my wedding ring like thanks buddy I remember
God dammit everything I said last night about jungle juice being awesome just does not carry over into the next day
Randomize
