no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
girl in front of me at starbucks just ordered 7 shots of espresso in her latte. welcome to finals week
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
I'm slowing backing away from her. I tried breaking up with her and it felt like I was clubbing baby seals.
I want an alcoholic time machine so we could skip to new years eve
Company party. Just told vp "you look like a cat person"
My date keeps hitting on your friend. Had no expectations, but not a real confidence booster.
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
I can't figure out how to get this beer bong in my carry on without airport security questioning me as it goes through the x-ray.
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
I came in and I guess my parents didn't hear me. My dad just said "Don't be lazy, RIDE IT." to my mom. Never coming home again.
You're the only person I know that could get laid while visiting their grandpa in florida
Randomize
