U dropped me off n it hit me, i made it inside for exactly shit thirty on the nose, another minute n i would of had brown trowsers
ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
i wish my penis had a tongue
I feel like today should be a " im going to have sex with you cause its raining and theres nothing else to do" kinda day
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
From now on, you must never doubt my ability to go from drunken rambling lovesick girl to Stepford wife within the course of a few hours.
When you get home...find me in the shower. Only safe place at the moment.
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
you never keep up with shots anymore
I'm trying to be more responsible these days
you fucking tried to take your pants off and pee in Taco Bell's parking lot
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
And pointless. I'm fully vested in all my calories coming from booze today. The salad just fucks that shit up
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
Randomize
