Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
Swine flu is the new snow day.
You are two creepy Justin Bieber quotes away from me not talking to you for the rest of the day
If I had a pelvic thrust emoticon, I would use it
if that dog is afraid of alcohol then he's no dog of mine
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
I knew it was going to be a good night when i heard another girl call his dick "Thor's Hammer"
i love that feeling when you wake up and have no idea how you got back to your dorm or why you have mac and cheese on your cheeks and eyelashes in your mouth
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
Is it bad that I'm tindering right now? I'm naked on his couch while he's slaving over legal documents for work. And he doesn't have cable, so what else am I supposed to do?
That was just an endearing nickname I called you before. I'm not gonna call you a filthy slut now that you are one, I don't want to hurt your feelings.
I have got to move on from this "sleeping with every drug dealer I meet" phase.
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
You claimed that someone else had vomited underneath you/on your hand
you were very insulted that we didn’t believe you that someone else vommed
Randomize
