Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
It's been a long time since I felt this bad on a Monday... and for that, I thank you.
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
I figured it out. If I have at least 4 shots of vodka before I start my day, EVERY day will be a good day.
There is nothing quite so awkward as watching topless bullriding with your mother next to you..
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
If you set your screensaver to be a slides show, make sure you remove dick pics first. This lesson 1 of living with your great aunt
You mowed a straight line through three yards because you were, and I fucking quote, "In the zone." I think they know.
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
From the bottom of my heart, thanks for never sending me unsolicited dick picks.
I accidently sent a dick pic to the group chat with her family. Right after they all said it was a pleasure having me for dinner. Wana drink with me?
She always used to joke about becoming a stripper. WHO'S FUNNY NOW?!
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
So do I get points for screwing my recently single ex boyfriend and then telling him to go fight for his ex back?
Randomize
