A disheveled girl in front of me just looked down, shrieked, and yelled to the girl next to her "what is this" while pointing at two large white stains near the crotch of her black jeans. I love that Thursdays are weekends, it makes awesome Friday mornings
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
Between my sister puke and rallying at the bar and my brother sending a drunk passed out naked pic in which his dick was exposed, I don't know which sibling to be more proud of this weekend.
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
If I die tonight somebody's going to have to let all my tinder matches know.
Look, if this is a cop, just lemme know that Mike is ok. Fuckin all star game
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
There's a guy in a plaid shirt running around asking everyone if they want to head butt him
Randomize
