I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
While she was crying about breaking up, he looked at her through his fork and said "of course she's upset, she's in jail." Having sex with him tonight.
what part of covering your puke with shaving cream seemed like a good idea?
The worst mistakes make the best memories. Write that down.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
She just came to my house, with puke in her hair, to wake up my dad and scream "happy fathers day you DILF!" at the top of her lungs
I can now tell my grandchildren Central Park has really great spots for quickies...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm going to have to take an awkward trip to the front desk to ask them if they found a pair of turquoise shorts and an "I'm the Mom" sweatshirt.
I'm putting you on my Emergency card so i can spend the last ounce of strength in my hospital bed to flip you off.
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
like, there should be nothing wrong with me wanting to watch you put on a bikini and roll around in a kiddie pool of jello
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