It's true. Ladies love me because I'm so strong and they feel safe. Not because of my pseudo charm and their impaired judgement after several drinks...
Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
Last night I ate parmesan cheese straight out of the container while watching Chelsea Lately. Look at what happens to me when you leave.
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
Blasting venetian snares and drinking a beer. I love being an adult. It's like being a child but with beer for breakfast, better music, and no one yells at you.
Ice that vagina down, get some coffee, and try not to walk with a limp. It's time to dominate, pull it together
Anxiously awaiting my period drinking Hershey's syrup from the bottle. Don't judge me
When I finally came to, I was in the DJ booth wearing his headphones while he was spinning. That's all I got.
VIVE LA RESISTANCE
Oh god, what now?
My professor congratulated me on turning my assignment in early. I didn't have the heart to tell him I only passed it in early cause my sex plans got canceled for the night.
Randomize
