i was puking in the toilet, he walked in and to talk to me and started puking in the sink.. Could this be my perfect man??
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
You know i think she's just using me for sex
I hate you.
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm just gonna ignore the fact that I have no pants on and find a way home. A good one-nighter never goes back for his pants.
She is banging on the liquor store door begging them to let her come in.
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
sometimes u just have to say fuck it and help a straight sixteen year old break into her uncles gay bar.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You have to summon your inner elephant
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
OKAY THAT'S CREEPY AND I'D PROBABLY ACCIDENTLY ORGASM
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
I share a birthday weekend with Easter this year, so that fucking sucks. I hate sharing...and I have to share with fucking Jesus this year.\n
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