That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
Tell her to not eat the pizza she threw up on.
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
yeah that always happens. i'm like the where's waldo of parties. i never even know where the fuck i'm at.
If i apologize for punching you in the liver repeatedly will you explain where the grass stains on my shoulders came from?
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
Marking my student's "don't do drugs" posters while simultaneously texting my dealer, is this what being a grown up is like?
What vodka is american?
Skyy. I already looked it up for 4th of july.
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
Being on probation is a nice change of pace. It's refreshing to wake up and know what I did last night.
I fell asleep while eating jimmy johns last night and then woke up at 5am and continued to eat it
Woke up. Found about 20 condoms upstairs. A hole in the couch. Bread on the floor. Going back to sleep.
It's sunday night and I just went to the store to buy cookie dough and condoms, I'm so proud of myself.
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
Randomize
