I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
On my arm I have 12 dashes, and below is written "plus 2 pretty stout whiskey drinks, so, you be the judge"
i can barely draw a stick figure let alone shave a heart into my pubes
I'm sorry for peeing on your door. But it was your decision to open it.
You know it was a challenge blowing out the candles. It was hard to think of a wish, while drunk, with a concussion.
I woke up five hours later with a mouthful of Jimmy John's while clinging to my sandwich.
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
You asked for his ID and then said "I am like a bouncer but for my vagina."
I can't tell if my roommate is crying or having sex and the fact that there's anime in the background is only making this more confusing
He’s exactly what I’m looking for: he’s got a broken heart, a working penis and a new boat!!!
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