Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
Jennifer and I just ate like 4 jello shots w/ a guy dressed as inspector gadget. We are still in the capital building btw
I love Texas.
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
We lit firecrackers from NYE in the fireplace and he was so passed out that he slept through it.
i'm not entirely sure that 'not getting kicked out of the bar until it got dark' really classifies as 'doing better'
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
It could be worse. I was dumped by a guy in a kilt after he gave my shoes away on St. Patrick's Day.
i'm face down in a ditch right now please help this is not a metaphor for my life this is real.
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
Then while I was crying on his shoulder, he got a boner. Soo. I kinda just hopped on.
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
You're at a grade school volley ball game with a yeti of tequila. You've passed extra
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
Randomize