Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
Every time I find out someone else from high school got pregnant accidentally, I want to declare victory over them.
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
I'm so tired I just poured monster in my coffee.
And it tastes incredible.
And I have chest pains.
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
I was playing 'If You Had To Fuck One or Die' with the old composite pictures with a guy in the bathroom line. They were all pretty ugly so I go "You can tell this is a lower tier frat"......turns out the guy was a brother
somehow I wound up on the floor crying about his beard. then telling everyone I'd give him a "lesbian blowjob".
If you find out what that means, show me.
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize
