Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
I just had a Brazilian done for this guy. He's getting first-date sex whether he wants it or not.
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
Dude I walked 1.4 miles through the hotel wearing a cowboy hat, pink topped boots, gucci shades, and a scarf and met my parents in the hallway at 7 am how is this not a good start to Vegas?
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
We need to get stoned and watch Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2. This has become a priority. Schedule accordingly.
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
Yo this huge scar on my head from the car accident is truly a vag magnet. Probably because I'm telling people I was attacked by a mountain lion and killed it with my bare hands. But hey when life gives you lemons, you use them to get pussy
I just tinder matched with a blue angels pilot. I need to make out with him. For America.
I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...
I'm gonna cum garlic butter
you told me you wanted to be a soccer mom with a high tolerance then you put the bottle to your face
Randomize
