You up for the gym tonight after work?
I'm up for a light workout and a nice yog.
Fair enough, I'm gonna hit it hard today.
Chris Brown style, or less felonious?
Haha, all felonious.
I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
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I just realized I'm gonna get paid at midnight on New Years Eve. That could be dangerous.
The first clue should've been that he literally had shit in his hair. How does that even happen?
Yeah, I wish I could have one upped you. But all I did was ride circles around a cop on a stolen bicycle while laughing at him for telling me to stop riding on the sidewalk.
Partying with them is like having your dick stapled to your left nostril
Just walked into your room to get my clothes and he's still passed out in your bed. Remind me to high five you when you get home
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i feel like spreading the word of drunken joy.
I am still awake. And let me sing you the song of my people. Ahem. "I have a bottle of hydrocodone and you all can fuck off."
Holy shit, we're married as fuck.
It was 3 am when she drunkenly tried to deep-fry a banana.
How'd she do that?
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
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