3 complete strangers have joyously high-fived me on campus today. Tell me why, starting after jager bomb #4.
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
now there's a facebook group for all the people whose lives i've ruined
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
i realized i had a pad on before i went to this guys house so i stuck it in his neighbors shrub.
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
No one knows who he is but he hasn't missed a shot in beer pong yet. He's dressed as lance armstrong and is tearing shit up.
Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
I made out with a girl because I wanted to get in the VIP section of the bar because they have these big comfy couches. It worked.
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
when i woke up with 300+ messages I didn't except them to be about coyotes and burning shoes.
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
WHY DON'T YOU WANT TO BE MY ESKIMO BRO
Randomize
