But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
And then a tiny penis fell out of my purse
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hey give me heads up if you're feeling vulnerable tomorrow night
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
We tried the hang n bang, remember? You ruined it by crying and telling me you loved me while blowing me.
It'll be a pair of asscheeks that light up when they're summoned.
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
did u drive by my house last night?
bc if that wasn't you i threw my bourbon bottle at the wrong van
Good rule of thumb: only list personal references with whom you have hallucinated
So I met one of her cousins last night. She recognized me as "the guy that's always in the liquor store", I may have a problem.
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
The blonde cop looked at my license and told me I better have be home when her shift ends
I hate you
Randomize