Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
It's a beautiful day for a hangover
Get dressed up for her? please, I could shit my pants and she would still blow me
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the day after is always just damage control
well i just set every background of each phone in the verizon store to my face
I looked at my arm when I woke up..I guess after 8 tally marks I said fuck it and wrote "too much"
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
Its like fucking yourself in the head with a weed strapon
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like alcoholism for beginners at my kitchen table.
My glasses are somewhere in your living room. Also, my underwear might be in your bathroom or on or around your porch. Sorry.
I just want to let you know how hung over I am today and I fucked a girl in a kangaroo costume last night.
I'm pretty sure "good advice you would give to a freshman for achieving success" isn't constituted by introducing them to your addy dealer...
it is my civic duty to ensure the success of our youth.
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
I'm eating an ice cream cone and pooping. Don't know how I'm gonna wipe.
Randomize