it turns out vodka filled condoms arent that funny
you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
I'd like to introduce you to my friend, Moderation. Enjoy each other's company this weekend.
Your friend and I already don't get along
She told me to act like the hulk during sex. Shit got 9 different shades of weird
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
Wake your sexy ass up. It's donut time.
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
Stop it with the monkey emojis. It's like sexting with Curious George
Jeff brought me a cup of coffee to my desk. He's getting a blow job.
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
he's not even weird he's been offering me different drinks all night
oh i remember now hes the guy that liked when i peed on him
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
You cannot ask her to resend the picture of her genital tattoo to you just so you can show your room mate. it is time to end your relationship with the Captain.
Randomize
