so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
Lesson Learned this Week... If it seems too good to be true he is probably just trying to get you pregnant.
Dude, didnt you only know that guy for a month and he is demanding offspring?
Apparently, at this age my womb is an early conversation
Best thing law school has taught me: how to use logic to turn a girls "no I will not have sex with you" into "well I might as well get laid"
I don't think my body can handle the alcohol I want to put in it anymore.
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
I think if my mom ever finds out about my nipple piercings I'll just be like "mom, tbh it's a sex thing"
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch
She leaned in close to me, made eye contact, and seriously whispered "I will eat your soul with bacon bits." I want whatever drug she was on.
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
Sex to movie scores is my best choice of the year. You've had an orgasm but have you had an orgasm with an entire orchestra.
You have my heart. You only share my vagina.
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
His dog hid my thong. Let me tell you, the last thing you want during a commando mini skirt walk of shame is lots of wind. There’s a church congregation that knows all my business
I just racked up a fucking ginormous hospital bill because I came so hard I had an asthma attack
Apparently my hair turned out really good because I got my butthole licked by a stranger last night
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