My right nipple has been called many things but never a ghost pig
pissed the bed twice, first one side then rolled over , other side. boom.
Hashbrowns don't come out your nose as easily as you would think
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
Sorry for feeding you peanuts last night while you were sleeping, you looked hungry.
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
the number of desperate girls at the gym right now is unfair. it would be cruel not to let one blow me.
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
I can still taste the Jäger. I'm gonna shoot myself.
I'm scrolling through our convo thread and all we talk about is pizza, alcohol & dick with the occasional "I miss you" thrown in.
Worst way to find out I have a half sister
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
Randomize
