whoa...plan B gets you drunker quicker.
oh, and bring over your fire extinguisher. we're gonna get the mailman again
to cover up your slurred speech you tried talking like the creepy old man from family guy
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You can come over, sure. But I'll be watching college hockey during the blow job.
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
After getting all 4 of my wisdom teeth removed I asked my dentist how much better would I be at head
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After we banged he volunteered to ducksit while I went to work. I think that's true love.
I AM BEING ACCOSTED BY A HUMMING BIRD
I AM IN MILD DISTRESS
I am naked and annoyed.
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
Went home with a guy last night with Taco Bell sauce in my hair and on my pants
I told him to take his man panties off and take the fucking Jaeger bomb already, so no to a 2nd date
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