I'm smoking weed out of a trumpet
I just did a slip and slide down the hall way of my apartment building
Tie
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
My roommate says its rare that you can be tear gassed before you lose your virginity so i feel accomplished in life
It's hard to take you serious when you're crying your eyes out wearing an adult sized onesie.
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
Why am I sleeping on top of the fridge?
You were playing hide and seek with the dog. she couldn't find you and you passed out.
You ruined the universe
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
Randomize
