it sounded like he was fisting a can of crisco.
It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
I'm gonna get drunk and through up on the first happy couple I see.
I seriously think I have a tan line on my stomach from getting a boner while in the taning bed.
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
Did you ever get our sex tape out of the rental car before you returned it?
We talked him into tasing himself.
I am so hung over a medically induced coma is beginning to sound appealing.
Dear Penis Owner...our records show that you are overdue for servicing...please contact our friendly associates to schedule a thoroughly satisfying experience today...operators are standing by...
Thought it only fitting this Jubilee weekend to snort lines with a 50 note
Your patriotism amazes me, the Queen would be proud!
The last time I saw her someone was carrying her on a bike and she was yelling that she was E.T.
What the fuck i just wanna eat my froot loops and sext in peace. Y'all motherfuckers gotta be loud as shit and break my concentration
That was my first party and they were so suprised that this little freshman girl was a FUCKING BEER PONG QUEEN.
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
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